The Hard Thing About Blogging

The hard thing about blogging is really trying to create the scene that I feel like I’m living. There are so many sights, smells, and feelings that happen when I do simple things like go to the gym or walk to the train. For example, grocery shopping here is like I’m INSIDE of a video game. The music is the main reason for this as it’s decidedly fast-paced and digital. In America, they have music down to a science. They want you to stay and spend money, so they play a genre and speed of music that is scientifically proven to make you do just that. Your heart rate slows, your eyes get droopy, and you’re almost drunk-shopping – stopping to sniff every candle or poke at whatever gadget entices you.

Here it’s a little different. When the big glass doors slide open in my grocery store there’s an immediate quicken to your pace. Your heart starts to beat along with whatever repetitive techno music is playing and all of a sudden you have an out-of-body experience. You can almost watch yourself shop from a bird’s-eye view of the store.

Let the insanity begin!

I throw things into my cart with a furiosity (I might have made that word up), as if they’re gold coins or bananas or little yellow dots or whatever the game may be. I dodge grannies and grampys as they stand there and compare expiration dates. I have to stop for kids while they run around screaming for no reason. It’s seriously funny when I imagine myself doing this.

This pace continues until I’m done. Standing in the checkout line is like beating the boss. I have no clue what that poor woman is saying to me, so the goal of the game is to smile and nod more than she does. When I accomplish that, she lets me go. I pack my things at the speed of sound, speedwalk to the door, give my basket a toss and my cart a push into where they belong, and I’m out the door. When I get outside, I’m sweating. I also feel really excited.

I mean, who wouldn’t. I just won the game…

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